Thursday, May 9, 2013

Slacking....

Unfortunately I have become a slacker; a blog writing slacker to be exact....

Averaging my time between working, working out, hanging out with friends, making time for family, cleaning, lawn work (a new add on to the list thanks to Spring), a funeral here and there and vacationing in Florida for a week, I've let down my blog and my 3 readers.  I will do better, promise.

xoxo,
Lisa
This Is Me Trying To Find Myself ;)

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Healthy competition?


To say I’m a competitive person is an understatement.     I wouldn’t go as far to say I’m a sore loser, but I’m a sore loser.  I don’t know what it is, but I’ve been overly competitive my entire life.  Growing up in a small town with two older brothers, I’ve always felt the need to be better than everyone else, so much so that when my 10th grade basketball coach moved me out of the starting rotation, I quit the team.  I don’t like to do things I’m not good at, period.  I don’t necessarily need to be the best at something, but mediocrity is not an option.  I’ve tried to change my ways and accept the fact that I can’t be good at everything, but I can’t get it through my thick scull.  Take for example bowling, I suck at bowling, therefore I don’t bowl.  It’s deductive reasoning at its finest.  I’m pretty good at cleaning, therefore I clean a lot.  Now I know what you’re thinking, bowling is fun, or winning isn’t everything, or my personal favorite don’t compete with others, compete with yourself, all in which are incredibly true statements for a majority of people out there, I simply have a hard time believing in these relatively simple and factual statements personally.  Take for instance the gym.  I’m a pretty avid exerciser and do my best to push myself out of my comfort zone, but you know what really pushes me to excel out of that comfort zone, the skinny bitch two treadmills down who should put up her kicks and grab a doughnut.  Or my favorite, the 50 year old dude who is running laps around me.   No offense to him and it’s awesome that he’s in such great shape, but I refuse to be lapped by someone twice my age, hence I kick it into high gear and prove something, what that something is, I’m not sure half the time.  I’m beginning to convince myself it’s proving the fact that I’m overly competitive, selfish and an asshole in more ways than one.  Hopefully putting this on paper will offer me a moment to reflect and change some of these ridiculous tendencies I’ve embraced most of my life.  After all, competition can be healthy and a good attribute to an individual, when it’s not abused.  I do think I’m my own worst enemy in a lot of ways and at the end of the day, I need to step back and realize that being over competitive is exhausting and ultimately, an unfair standard to abide by.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Mi Mama

Mi Mama


This photo of my mother and I, was taken last fall.  We've been through a lot together and I admire her overwhelming kindness and resilience.  She's a one of a kind lady and I wouldn't trade her for the world.

All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.
                                                                     Abraham Lincoln 

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Time flies....

It's official, as of March 20th I'm now another year older and slowly knocking on 30's door.  I must say, my twenties have been a blast and I can't wait to see what the future has in store.  Now at the age of 27, I can happily say I have graduated from college, have a stable career, own my own home, have a solid group of friends and a wonderful fiance and pup to top it all off.  Life is good.  What's crazy for me to think about is how fast time flies out of high school.  I can't wrap my head around the fact that next year I'll be invited to my 10 year reunion (notice I didn't say attend ;)  I'm not sure if anyone really understands the premise that time flies out of high school, but it's the honest truth.  As I get older and adjust to adult life, I'm fairly surprised as to how I've changed through the years in a few different aspects of my life.  One example would be my progression of slight OCD.  I never thought in a million years I would be so content in a routine, somewhat mundane schedule that consumes my life, but I dig it and couldn't imagine things any other way.  Don't get me wrong, I'm all about spontaneity, however I definitely enjoy a routine schedule during the work week, it seems to keep me sane and highly productive.  Another instance in my OCD is my increasing drive to clean.  I've really turned into a clean freak and I'm really not sure where this came from, but regardless, I like tracks in my carpet and clean sheets on my bed at all times.  The last realization I ponder upon as I grow, is my newly found interest in my physical and mental health.  Going through both mental and physical distress, really does put a healthy-type lifestyle into perspective and you quickly learn not to take either for granted.  While I'm by no means the epitome of mental or physical health, I believe my experiences and countless research has really catapulted my passion for being the best me that I can be, and for that I'm thankful.  While we all have our vices, it's important not to indulge in things that can tear life apart, such as fast food, alcohol or reality television. At the end of the day, life's too short to sweat the small stuff and time is too precious to take it for granted.    Peace and love.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Respect your elders...!?!

We've been told since we were young to always respect our elders.  Fine.  Great.  I get it.  I practice this rule of thumb or piece of advice, if you will, and I truly do agree with the overall premise.  However, the older I'm getting, the more I'm coming to the realization that I was somewhat misled as to why it was important to respect your elders.  I was under the assumption we were taught to respect and listen to our elders, because they knew right from wrong and more so, they knew more than you.  Well, unfortunately that's not the case.  It appears as if my intuitions on some "adults" were accurate, they're rather unintelligent and really quite ignorant and settled in childish like behavior.  I've bared witness to numerous adults in my line of work that leaves me constantly blown away with their adolescent type behavior and crude antics.  I often find myself shaking my head and wondering why my maturity level is well beyond their 50 something years of life, when I'm half their age.  Take this weekend for example.  I was working in Minneapolis at a tradeshow promoting my company's products.  While exhibiting, I meet a slew of different people, including fellow exhibitors showcasing their products.  This man, who must have been approaching 60, was there with his wife, they sold cookie mixes.  In an effort to sell their cookie mixes, they brought prepared samples of the mixes for the potential buyers to try.  The one day, the man came over and offered me a sample, to which I graciously accepted and ate. "Thank you," I said.  He then proceeds to tell me, "You're welcome, I have to get rid of these before my wife eats them, lord knows she doesn't need them."  With his back already turned away from me, my jaw dropped.  If this wasn't the pot calling the kettle black, I don't know what is, for he easily had a good 10-15 pounds on his wife.  Sure both weren't in excellent shape, but that's neither here nor there.  Throughout the weekend, a couple more snide comments came and went and I really had to bite my lip. Observing this man, I was appalled by his arrogance and overall facade. I was speaking with his wife when he was away from the booth, to which he came around the corner and handed her a check "Some big fat lady just ran up and gave this to me," to which she asked whom he was referring to, he chuckled and said "Mary Jane," who was the show's coordinator, a very nice woman whom I sure went out of her way in kindness and gratitude for their business, to which he mocked so carelessly and without regard.   I found myself despising this man. The last crude comment came towards the end of the show when a lady with purple hair and a rainbow t-shirt came up to me to place an order for my products.  After she departed, he walked up to me and said "you know, back in Michigan (acting like I hadn't told him 5 times already that I too lived in Michigan) rainbows mean something...." Just the way he said it, I knew he was insinuating that she may be gay, and that was a bad thing.  As if she was promoting criminal behavior.   It took almost everything I had not to say, - you're a fucking idiot, rainbows represent many things and yes, being homosexual is one of them and for that I love rainbows. And oh yeah, it's not just a Michigan thing you moron.  This man really grind my gears and he wasn't he first, nor the last elder that will let me and society down.  Back at the workplace we have older employees who take part in high school like behavior, that I really detest.  I guess the moral of the story is, respect is something you give to people of all ages, but only if they deserve it.  Being an elder, no longer in my eyes, gives you a right of passage to demand respect, for if you act like an ignorant, judgmental, awful human being, I owe you nothing except maybe a cold shoulder.     

Sunday, March 17, 2013

St. Patrick's Day 2013

Happy St. Patty's day everyone!  The month of March offers so many valuable/fun days, including: St. Pat's day, the first day of spring, March madness and last, but certainly not least; my birthday - who wouldn't love March as much as I do!?  Above all of March's festivities, there's something about St. Patrick's day that I just can't get enough.  Perhaps it's the celebration of my distant Irish relatives, or the overly green light draft beer and the never ending gulps of Guinness, Irish car bombs, the color green, the celebration/recognition of luck, rainbows, gold, the color green, more beer, corned beef sandwiches, the return of McDonald's shamrock shakes, leprechauns and did I mention the color green?  While I can normally be found partaking in the usual St. Pat's shenanigans at my local dive, this year I find myself two states over in Minnesota for work, surrounded by strangers and non-celebrators. =(  Half of the people who I run into aren't even wearing green, to which I find myself wanting to pinch them and tell them to go back to Canada or wherever they came from, but then quickly realize I don't want to be that creepy guy.  Nonetheless, I'm celebrating in my festive green wardrobe and partying in my head, and lets face it- I'll be practicing for next year's St. Patrick's day all throughout the year. ;)

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

I'm not looking to run the Boston Marathon any time soon, although....

I've always been a pretty avid exerciser.  Looking to challenge myself mentally and physically, (and really against my better judgement) I ran my first 10 mile race two years ago and I haven't looked back since.  With the encouragement of my friend David, we "trained" for months before the race and both hit the pavement hard on a warm mid-summer morning in Flint, MI at the Crim Festival of Races.  Running for any length of time and distance is definitely out of my comfort zone, particularly when surrounded by thousands of people and quickly realizing the hard way that avoiding hills during training was not the best idea.  We crossed the finish line in just under 2 hours, a time which I knew David could have easily shaved down, yet he ran, or rather jogged/walked by me the whole time.  A true friend, to say the very least. Fast forward one year and we participated in the race again, but this time running the 8K race.  We were a bit faster on our feet with more running experience under our belt, we pushed through those same hills and people as the year prior, but this time cutting our distance in half, a far more comfortable avenue but still no walk in the park, no pun intended.  I'm not sure what this years Crim will have in store for us, but what I do know is that I plan on participating the race in some way, shape or form.  For me, there's perhaps no better sense of accomplishment than pushing myself out of that comfort zone and finishing something I never in a million years dreamed I would do. I don't know if I would go as far as saying I'm a "runner," but I am definitely a "jogger."      

**There in the picture is my friend David, me and our friend/# 1 supporter Matt!

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Past & Contemporary Rhetoric with the Advancement of Technology

Well, I apologize in advance, for this is a long one.  Technology and the advent of social media and their ramifications on relationships, education and society overall has been a hot topic for me recently and discussed in depth with some close friends.  This brought me to looking at an old paper I wrote for a COM/Rhetoric type class I took in 2011 at UM-F. I've pasted the paper below:

Past & Contemporary Rhetoric with the Advancement of Technology
Cogito ergo sum, translated as I think therefore I am, is an immensely deep declaration originating from Rene Descartes on the tail of the Renaissance during the time period known as The Enlightment.  Such an acknowledgement is a great basis and foundation surrounding the evolution of humans from centuries past.  The human mind is such a powerful tool that it’s difficult to imagine replacing it with anything else.  As a matter of fact, it’s because of such powerful minds we are now able to stand here in the 21st century with technologies beyond our wildest dreams.  While the object of technology should not be to replace the human mind, but rather enhance it, it’s important we as a society remain grounded and intellectual, just as the great philosophers of the past exuded.
For centuries rhetoric has been the driving force behind civilization.  In persuasion, debates, inquiries, influence, leadership or determination, rhetoric has truly paved the way for advancement and progression.  Today in the 21st century we rely very heavily on technology to enforce and influence some of the great rhetorical theories of the past.  This was quite the contrary to how rhetoric and persuasion was handled prior, for rhetoric dates back to ancient Greece with the influences of some of the most famous philosophers of all time. To have a better understanding of the influence of contemporary argumentation and persuasion, with the advancement of technology, it is first very important to study the influence of those philosophers of the past.
            There was little freedom in the time of Ancient Greece.  There were very strict limitations for what constituted a citizen and people had limited people or places to turn to in a time of despair.  Individuals were not privy to the works of Socrates or Aristotle and their options were few and far between. 
The Greek Sophists were extremely influential in a time where many people felt ill-equipped with the education and overall knowledge to influence others and find different successes throughout society.  The Sophists would travel throughout Athens and teach others the rules of rhetoric for a monetary fee.  The Sophists were driven by a business venture which they would in turn offer their knowledge and experiences which were certainly in high demand.  “Sophisim” was an extremely influential time in human advancement and the starting gate for the theories of rhetoric. 
            Another influence to rhetoric came from Gorgias of Leontini.  Gorigias had a huge influence in rhetoric in his persuasive verbal power and his cunning sense about culture.  Gorgias was highly regarded for his teaching and learning styles and seemed to really connect with people throughout Greece.  Because of Gorgias, society took notice of the concept of eloquence and its power in speech.  The progression of society seems to be on a path of optimism and virtue and continues with Plato of the Phaedrus.
            With Plato of the Phaedrus comes rhetoric as a techne.  Phaedrus is very open and to the practice and teachings of rhetoric and compiled a list of rules for effective persuasion.  Plato of the Phaedrus was able to discuss in great length the idea of rhetoric with the great Socrates and eventually influences Socrates into accepting the idea of rhetoric.  With more and more acceptance, society hits its stride and we move into a time of Aristotle and the continuation of how powerful the human mind really is.
            Aristotle, one of the most recognizable philosophers of all time held many important thoughts and ideas of society and represented a huge interest in teaching others the essentials to life and success.  In specific, Artistotle’s Rhetoric is what I consider to be the handbook of all things rhetoric.  The text begins with Aristotle explaining the correlation between dialect and rhetoric.  “Both alike are concerned with such things as come, more or less, within the general ken of all mean and belong to no definite science   (  Aristotle, 1 ). Continuing his thoughts with the confidence of truth over falsity, knowledge and instruction and how ethos, pathos and logos play an intricate role in providing proof in persuasion. The knowledge brought forth from Aristotle was legendary and still practiced to this day.
            Leaving the Greek origins of persuasion theory, society moves forward to the time of Ancient Rome, the Middle Ages, and the Renaissance.  During these particular times rhetoric and the expansion of the human mind evolves further into the realm of past society.  Individuals like St. Augustine, Castiglione and Machiavelli hold reign throughout the land and they too bring forth important ideas surrounding rhetoric and its practice among society.
            Augustine was a huge ambassador for Western Christianity and used the Bible as the handbook of life on earth and its civilization.  Coming into the Middle Ages and in a time of “social chaos,” Augustine introduced On Christian Doctrine as a reference piece for translating Biblical scriptures.  By teaching others the Truth from Biblical scriptures, Augustine was able to set a standard for what was orthodox. Augustine definitely took advantage of the current state of affairs back then and led by example.  Augustine refers to rhetoric stating that it is a “critical tool” and a “performative skill.”
            Transitioning away from Augustine, Castiglione begins to reign his influence on the wave of humanism throughout The Renaissance and the rebirth of Europe.   Using his wit and cunning knowledge, Castiglione influences his leadership skills to teach the ways of influencing a court.  Essentially, people became skeptical of certain religious ideas set forth from Augustine and developed a foundation for doubt- which was certainly a huge stride in human rhetoric. 
            Castiglione introduces The Book of the Courtier, which is a series of multiple conversations among the courtiers in the time of the Duke of Urbino.  The meaning behind the conversations is simple, to decipher what goes into making the perfect courtier.  Castiglione presents a new influence on leadership and rhetoric stating that its not necessarily about what you know, but rather how well you can portray to others what they think you know. Grace and charm are key attributes. 
            Maintaining the humanistic approach, Machiavelli is introduced in the awakening of Europe.  Machiavelli continues forward with the stance that he doesn’t need things such as religion and ethics to run a government.  It was irrelevant to Machiavelli whether one was of good character or in general a good person.  Lie, deceive and step on as many people as necessary for achievement.  Certainly very blunt and radical, it was the best way Machiavelli saw fit for humans to succeed at any costs.  Dare we say this is similar to today’s status quo? 
            The Enlightment period offered new hope and insight on the progress of human civilization.  Things like logic and rationality led the way as new ventures into civilization.  Modernity is introduced as a Western History staple and people are left to the positive future outlook with colonialism and industrialization settling in.  Science hits its stride and literacy reaches the masses.  Before we know it we’re in the present day 21st century where technology has an enormous impact on the world as we know it.
            Technologies of the past were minuscule, to say the least. In the 1430’s the printing press was invented and had a huge influence on education and society.  Since the days of Ancient Europe, civilizations have been introduced to countless inventions ranging from cameras, morse code, radio to television and the type writer.  In present day we’re equipped with perhaps the most influential tool mankind has seen yet for mass communication, the internet. The invention of the internet had a huge impact on not only education and civilization, yet also was a very important venue for persuasion and rhetoric.
            The invention of the internet came shortly after the invention of the personal computer and the world wide web in 1991 ( History ).  The internet is by far the most technologically savvy mode for mass communication that any society has yet to witness.  In addition to communicating, people use the internet to research, educate and influence others.  Rhetoric can certainly be enhanced by the internet.    One literally has the world at their fingertips.  Although there are some negative effects that come with technology, there are definitely heaps of benefits when it comes to theories on rhetoric. 
            The internet offers a vast array of different opinions, thoughts and ideas to be broadcasted all over the world.  For rhetoricians, scholars, or one who is simply hoping to persuade or influence other, the internet can be an extremely powerful tool.  Whether it’s chatting, blogging, tweeting, emailing or streaming, there appears to be endless options for open and blank slates for one to share their opinions about something to the entire world.
            Furthermore, it’s not just convenience and availability that enforces the ties between rhetoric and internet, for immediacy also plays a crucial role. The fact that news, events and information can be streamed almost instantaneously is astonishing- something people like Socrates, Aristotle or Augustine would be flabbergasted over. The internet literally allows people to view things in “real time” and there’s a huge captive audience on the receiving end.  “Ownerless, borderless, and essentially absent of time and space, it nonetheless provides, creates, and perpetuates the rhetorical and literal context for the exchange of a variety of messages for an ever-increasing variety of rhetors to ever-increasing multifaceted and fractured audiences,” ( Krausse ) states professor Steven D. Krause from Eastern Michigan University. 
            Additionally, the internet has certainly opened numerous educational doors for the study of not just rhetoric, but all things worth learning.  One can access countless research sites, encyclopedias, books, dictionaries, newspaper articles; the possibilities are again nearly endless -without leaving the comfort of their home. Some have named this mode of learning “online learning” or “virtual learning.”
            Using the internet to fulfill class credits is nothing new in the 21st century.  Enrollment in online classes becomes more and more popular every day as institutions strive to fulfill a student’s expectations of convenience and “high-tech opportunities.”
According to the St. Petersburg Times newspaper, more than 20 percent of college students enrolled in online classes in 2007, equating to 3.94 million students and almost doubling the number of enrollees in 2003 ( Vander ). Perhaps even more astonishing is the rise of K-12 online learning.
            The New York Times has reported that “Nationwide, an estimated 1.03 million students at the K-12 level took an online course in 2007-8, up 47 percent from two years earlier, according to the Sloan Consortium, an advocacy group for online education. About 200,000 students attend online schools full time, often charter schools that appeal to home-schooling families, according to another report ( Gabriel ). The classes were noted as being very popular among make-up classes, advance placement classes and those classes that have too few students to fill a classroom. Perhaps most shocking, high school students in Memphis are required to take an online class as a graduation requirement ( Gabriel ).
It becomes increasingly more apparent that the internet has certainly influenced rhetoric and education as a whole. However, I can’t help ask if there’s such thing as too much of good thing?  Does “information overload” truly exist?  Could it be that the internet has somewhat replaced what were once deemed sophists, in so far as both claim to have infinite access to knowledge and successes, yet when left to their own devises ill intent presents itself? Do students who solely rely in online classes perhaps face the likelihood of facing difficulties with interacting with the real world?
Kairos was central to the Sophists, who stressed the rhetor's ability to adapt to and take advantage of changing, contingent circumstances” ( Kairos ).  Technology, even through the heaps of benefits and possibilities, certainly appears to have a dark side.  Could it be that the internet begins to make it much easier for the human mind to slack on things like thought, invention, ideas, and general stance and principal?  I believe that technology certainly does encourage laziness, both physically and mentally.
The internet, much like the real world, is full of social chaos, numerous falsities, inaccurate statements, unreliable resources, and persuasive insights from unwanted and unwarranted influences.  Hate groups are now in tuned to social media’s internet and use it as their medium to promote appalling ideas and thoughts. The internet- although very useful and helpful in most instances, left to certain individuals own demise can be extremely ridicule and dangerous to the untrained eye or those of gullible personalities.
Take for example the Ku Klux Klan.  In an article titled The Internet Rhetoric of the Ku Klux Klan: A Case Study in Web Site Community Building Run Amok, author Denise Bostdorff explains in great detail that some groups like the K.K.K. engage individuals by way of the internet to promote hate towards minorities in attempt to influence others. “The angry style of Klan discourse, which is compatible with the rhetorical conventions of the Web, discourages dissenting points of view while inflaming potential supporters.  Moreover, Klan rhetoric on the Web encourages odious political activity, including acts of violence, at the same time that Klan web sites disavow responsibilities for the consequences of their messages” ( Bostdorff ).
In addition to the impact of internet with hate groups, there are also the never ending, daunting scams.  Scam artists throughout the world find their way through cyberspace to prey on the uninformed and sometimes the most informed and savvy individuals out there.  It certainly takes a trained eye to identify what’s real from what’s fiction.  According to the Federal Buerau of Investigation’s 2007 Internet Crime Report, Pet scams, Funds Transfer Scams and Charity Frauds were some of the most reported internet scams around.  Pet scams involve those wanting to purchase or adopt a pet, fork out the cash with no pet in return.  Funds Transfer Scams typically involves wire transferring to a “trusted” business partner or friend, when in reality it’s a scam to receive quick cash.  Lastly there are the Charity Frauds where a good samaritan is taken advantage of with the hopes of helping others, when really their money is going to a con artist ( FBI ).       
It has become painstakingly obvious how the internet can indeed have a negative effect on education and rhetoric.  Doctor Krause later discusses in his dissertation on the immediacy of information stating that “If messages can be delivered and received immediately and simultaneously by multiple audiences and rhetors without regard to physical time or space, how can we determine and define ‘context’?” In addition Krause adds that “’Immediacy’ then, the subject of this dissertation, is my personal term and effort to come to some understanding about the nature of rhetorical situations and contexts in a postmodern world, and how immediate rhetorical situations are altered by the technologies employed to deliver the messages”                  ( Krausse ).
            With all of the negative impacts the internet can have on rhetoric, it’s important to embrace more popular and traditional modes of rhetoric embraced by both philosophers of the past and more contemporary philosophy ambassadors of the present. Society should certainly be open to new ideas and, however it’s important to not leave behind philosophy’s roots.  Whether its Plato’s influence on discourse, Aristotle’s embrace on persuasion or Machiavelli’s influence on style and deception, there’s plenty of valuable theories surrounding rhetoric that are both revolutionary and timeless.
Lastly, technology, internet included, can certainly go hand in hand with scholars of rhetoric so long as we don’t leave behind theories of the past and fall into the countless traps that tend to flood the internet.  It’s extremely important to be critical and responsible when it comes to the information and statistics found online.  Because there is so much information floating around on the web, be particular and look to those reliable sources for information, not just Joe’s Blog, for more times than not, Joe is not the expert.  
While there are certainly both positive and negative effects that derive from the internet, it’s important to find a happy median and remain open-minded, yet critical with new technological advancements.  With appropriate knowledge and experience, there’s certainly useful information to be obtained from the internet to perhaps make today’s world a better place. Keeping in mind that there’s a reason why we still read the great philosophy works of the past and as long as we use technology to embrace past works and present day thoughts, the two certainly can live in harmony.  However remember that while the object of technology should not be to replace the human mind, but rather enhance it, it’s important we as a society remain grounded and intellectual, just as the great philosophers of the past exemplified.  

Friday, March 8, 2013

Meat no more!?


My friend David and I like to challenge ourselves from time to time with these, for the betterment of our lives/health, type challenges.  We’ve encouraged each other to train for a ten mile race, try new workouts, cleanses and different all sorts of diet deprivations.   This week we challenged ourselves to eliminate meat from our diet.  While neither of us our necessarily hard core carnivores, we do both love our chicken and the occasional .50 cent taco Tuesday from the nearby pub.  Now on day 5 of my meatless diet, I can truthfully say, I miss chicken. J  I’m glad and happy to do these challenges from time to time, however I’m a firm believer that meat in moderation is a good thing.  Do I need it every day, no.  Do I crave it every day, no.  Do I want processed, chemically enhanced chicken, no.  Do I want an occasional chicken breast floating on my leafy greens, YES!   The moral of the story is, challenging yourself physically and mentally is the best medicine to living a happy/healthy life.  Our workout instructor always tells us that our bodies become used to the same workout routine, so we have to switch it up.  I think the same can be said for our diets and what we choose to put in our bodies.  Don’t be scared to try new things and leave some of the old habits at bay for a while, who knows you may discover something, be it a feeling, emotion or physical change, one in which you may have never had the chance of encountering otherwise.  

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

An addendum to last post


This is an addendum, if you will, referencing my previous post “College Grad Expectations Beyond the Paper.”

When thinking about poor communication skills in today’s college grads, I can’t help but think of the impact of technology and its ability to hinder some of those basic communication skills.  Remember a day in age when people picked up the phone to communicate with someone?  Or how about that time when we wrote out thoughtful, complete words and sentences in composing a letter or postcard of a sort to communicate with loved ones, friends or pen pals?  Better yet, remember when we used to go knock on someone’s door to ask for a cup of sugar, see if little Johnny could come out and play or perhaps to simply say ‘hello’ with a basket of cookies in hand?  In this day in age, we've become subjected to convenience, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, however one has to sit back and ask themselves, to what expense? 

I’m reminded of a distant, younger (in her late teens) relative of mine and her painstaking shyness in public places and communicating face to face with people.  Difficult to watch at some points, I’m amazed at how soft spoken and short she is with, not just the public, but with family members as well, myself included.  On the contrary and to my complete surprise, put this young lady behind a keyboard and it’s as if she was an outgoing, extremely popular and a highly confident person.  The point is, I do believe that technology is a crutch for so many, especially those born in the late 80’s and beyond, to disengage with the real world.  With the advent of online learning, it wouldn't surprise me if some college students pushed the limits, avoiding face to face/verbal communication correspondences and enrolling in as many online classes as possible, fearful of that student/teacher interaction on campus.   No wonder employers are disappointed. 

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

College Grad Expectations Beyond the Paper


While listening to NPR yesterday, I was highly intrigued by the segment they were airing in reference to the qualification gaps that occur between today’s post college graduates and the employers looking to hire for entry level positions.  Putting today’s high unemployment rates aside for the moment, the segment focused more on the information and insight from both the student graduate on their difficult job hunts, to the employers and what they perceive as issues that frequently arise from students leaving the university to enter the “real world.”  First and foremost, one particular study noted that many employers looking to hire college grads were disappointed in the lack of general communication skills the applicants possessed.  Poor interview skills, poor eye contact, the inability to write an effective business letter and lack of enthusiasm, all which played a part in why many employers passed on post collegiate applicants.  Those that did hire these individuals with their fancy papers, noted that they made the new hires go through multiple interviews, a rigorous trial periods and even yearlong training programs.  Moreover, one of the most highly praised qualifications for applicants was their involvement in an internship.   Employers and applicants alike praised the involvement of internships for the skill sets, communication fundamentals and basic office/work place etiquette, all in which aren’t so easily learned within academic walls.  Whether it’s praise for internships or the dismay for inadequate communication skills, I wholeheartedly back each notion as prime factors in obtaining a new career.

Graduating from The University of Michigan-Flint last winter, I now posses that fancy paper that will likely back my future job inquiries, however, I’ve been ‘faking it until I made it’ for a loooong time.  I’d like to thank my above average communication skills for that.   Fresh out of high school I enrolled at the university and began my job search immediately.  It was approximately my 3rd or 4th interview at a law firm that I amped up my game.  Extremely under qualified, the odds were against me, to say the least.   However, given the chance to even interview, I knew I had the possibility to sell myself and could do so with a smiling face, exuberant personality and unmistakable drive to impress and succeed.  Concluding the interview, I remember the lawyer looking at me with a grin, telling me how under qualified I was, reminding me that my pay would be decreased from the original offered amount, however he was willing to give me a shot.  That’s all I ever asked for.  Having a personality that says “determined,” or hell even “I give a shit,” says a lot.  Having been somewhat of an older, non-traditional student if you will, I can recall encountering several students at the university that lacked in basic human to human interaction, precisely why classes like public speaking and communication theory should be required as a gen. ed. class, period.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think this topic falls 100% on the university, but rather on the students themselves to strive for more.  The university can only do so much, but it’s up to the individual whether or not they push themselves out of their comfort zone and become more than complacent in both their academic careers and overall communication skills.

Lastly, the idea of an internship, or in my case, a full-time job, can teach these valuable skills and lessons that both employers and students strive for, is an understatement.  I believe it’s extremely advantageous for students to have that “real world” experience.  I think for an employer to hold so much weight on these types of credentials is absolutely warranted.  I’ve learned years of valuable lessons that a college education simply can’t equate to.  While I certainly learned an overwhelming amount of information during my college years, I also learned some not so important things, which as pessimistic as it may sound, was a waste of time, energy and money.

In any event, I simply wanted to comment on the segment and give my endorsement to the findings.  My wheels have certainly been turning, for if employers, in today’s day and age are having a hard time finding qualified individuals, perhaps I should take my communication degree, work experience and awesome ( J ) personality down a new, perhaps more rewarding avenue than the one I currently travel. 
-A professor once told me (whom I believe his professor once told him), communication majors may not always be the first hired, but likely to be the first ones promoted -

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Yes, Pure Michigan


Is it Spring yet?  Nothing says a fresh, New Year better than the tease of spring.  Having been born on the first day of spring, which depending on which calendar you’re looking at could be fact or lie, I’ve always been fond of the season of new beginnings.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not one of those individuals who hates winter and complains every time a snowstorm blows in, however this late in the winter season, I think it’s only normal for people to be waiting, wishing, hoping for a change in season.  After all, that’s what is so great about living in Michigan, the change of seasons.  Winter, spring, summer and fall are all prevalent in this great lakes state, reason 106 why I love living here.  Despite popular belief, it’s not winter here 24-7 and we actually have some of the most beautiful summer destinations around, including but not limited to the Sleeping Bear Sand Dunes in northwest Michigan, which was recently voted Good Morning America’s number one  ‘most beautiful place in America.’  Despite our lackluster economy, Michigan is comprised of so much more than the auto industry and home of the great lakes.  Michigan is an extremely diverse land and population, complied of: yoopers from the Upper Peninsula, the entertainment mecca in Detroit, little Bavaria in Frankenmuth, the Mighty Mac, four pro-sports teams and countless areas throughout the entire state, rich in history and pride.  To me, Michigan is a place I’m glad to call home.  

Monday, February 25, 2013

“We judge as important what the media judges as important”


“We judge as important what the media judges as important”

This blog is an excerpt from my very last undergrad paper I wrote at University of Michigan-Flint last year, in reference to the agenda setting theory and current events.  Popularized in 1972, Maxwell McCombs and Donald Shaw were interested in the overwhelming influence of mass media’s ability to transfer the salience of issues on their news agenda to public agenda.

In October of this year there were two big stories to cover in media, one was the political storm of the presidential race and the other was an actual storm named Sandy.    As both storms were gaining momentum, the media quickly found themselves in the crosswinds of a headline battle.  Suddenly a decision was forced to be made by media outlets as to which story trumped the other, in so far as which story was more prominent, frequent and how much time and energy was devoted to that particular story, hence the media’s agenda, which was exactly what Shaw and McComb look to uncover in their theory.  

While some individuals (the media) could argue that preparations for hurricane sandy were less important than election coverage, I think the majority of people would think the opposite.  After all, people’s health, well-being and lives are in jeopardy.

Whether you call it the effects of global warming, climate change or the Mayan’s doomsday, Natural Disasters are on the rise and it’s important that the media serves as a catalyst for the proper recovery efforts and particularly preparation warnings and strategies for the betterment of society.   
-“As natural and human-produced disasters increase around the world, public health messages promoting local preparedness and coordinating expert planning efforts are increasingly important.”  American Journal of Public Health

In addition to Hurricane Sandy, it has been estimated that over the ten year span between 2000-2010, approx. 5,000 natural disaster affected more than 2.2 billion people worldwide, killing approx. 850,000. These stats are quite staggering.  It’s becoming more and more obvious that there’s definitely a cause for concern and government officials and citizens alike are beginning to take notice.

When natural disasters are imminent, disaster preparations need to set precedent in the media’s coverage above other seemingly less important headlines that are not life threatening of alerting. This wasn’t the case for many media outlets in October of 2012.

To demonstrate the considerable difference between media’s agenda of prevention strategies and the severe outcomes of natural disasters, one needs to look no further than the most reliable name in news, CNN.  Looking through CNN’s archives, despite solid weeks’ notice from field professionals that Sandy was on her way, I located only about 30 articles about preparations. After Sandy hit, there were over 275 headlines articles, confirming the theory, “if it bleeds it leads”.
Perhaps even more surprising was comparing election headlines to sandy headlines. I was able to locate more than twice the amount of headlines referencing the election than those headlines for sandy’s preparation.  Those headlines that were present reflected headlines that read “Obama monitors hurricane, campaign says it will remain at full speed.” i.e.-government agenda=media agenda.

What this meant was on October 29th when Sandy pounded the U.S., many citizens in the densely populated areas of east coast were ill-prepared.  According to climate and weather specialists, Sandy brought with her more than 15 inches of rain, wind gusts upwards of 90 mph, dumped nearly 3 feet of snow and most chocking was the near 15 feet ocean tides. Her stat’s are a prime indicator as how important prevention strategies are in the media.

Further, after the disaster hits, when dispersing relief aid information and progress, the media mustn’t over sensationalize effects of the disaster.  Clearly this can be damaging to the media’s reputation and credibility, (chicken little), the public may not listen next time there’s a real imminent danger.

While predicting natural disaster may not always be 100% accurate, technology has really upped the ante as far as their accuracy to inform society of the imminent and increasing threats to civilization.  Perhaps media news outlets should look to Bloomberg Businessweek and their exuberant magazine cover that simply stated “It’s Global Warming Stupid,” I'm sure that headline surely grabbed people’s attention.  

Friday, February 22, 2013

Regret & Happiness


I heard on a radio station the other day that people who were aware of the fact they were nearing the end of their lives, many shared a common regret, which was not allowing themselves to be happy.  The study found that most people become complacent in various areas of their lives, thus never allowing themselves to truly be happy.  I have to be honest, I was a little surprised that MANY shared this similar regret, for one is only as happy as they allow themselves to be; the only thing holding one back from being happy is them.  Sure there are several factors that can attribute to bad days, bad moods, small stints of ‘funk,’ however at the end of the day, it’s up to you to decide what makes you happy and to fulfill those needs.   I’m fascinated as to how people have the inability to laugh, let loose or find the everyday beauty and joy that life has to offer.  I too have been in dark places, however I was hell bent on getting myself out of those miserable places, dire to find true happiness again.  When I’m nearing the end of my life, I’m sure I’ll have the typical I wish I sky jumped, or I never forgave so and so, but I really hope I never find myself in the same boat as the individuals in this recent study, yearning for happiness that’s perhaps too little, too late.  

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

#AfterNewtown



I watched a segment at 4am this morning on PBS regarding Adam Lanza and the unforgettable Sandy Hook tragedy.  I’m typically not an early bird, however I was absolutely enthralled in what I was watching.  Beyond the realms of how truly fucked our present day society is, with media sensationalizing,  combined with lack of attention from peers, parents and other such guardians to teach, acknowledge and properly care for troubled individuals, we’re left with a society torn on gun control and what should occur.  While I’m not about to get into a lengthy gun debate, I can tell you one thing; the status quo is not working.   This issue is so precarious, words literally escape me.  However, I want to end with something that I heard from one of the PBS journalist’s which I believe is the truth: ‘it’s not metal detectors we need to detect guns, rather what we need are people detectors.’ 


Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Service Industry Truths

I recently read an article about President Obama increasing the federal minimum wage, including those continuously overlooked employees in the service industry whose dismal wage, well below the standard minimum age, is also due for an increase.  Kudos, about damn time.  This reminded me of an essay, or more like a non-fictional account of my life I had to write for a class at UM-Flint in 2008.  Putting in nearly 10 years with the service industry is something I definitely don't regret,  however it's certainly something I'll never forget, if you've worked in the industry before, you should find this amusing, enjoy!


One Tough Gig

Since when can I ask did manners go out of style?  There’s absolutely nothing that perturbs me more than rude, cheap people and there’s nowhere perhaps more accustomed to seeing both rude and cheap people than waiting tables or bartending.  Trust me, I speak from experience.
Allow me to set the scenario for you.  A couple walks in and sits at your table.  Peering from behind the wait station you try to guess what kind of mood these people are going to be in, but you really have no clue what you’re about to get yourself into.  Walking up to the table in a light, peppy step you greet the folks and then all of a sudden, it’s as if time has stood still. 
“Good afternoon folks, my name is Lisa how are you doing this lovely day?”  Crickets can be heard chirping outside.  Then suddenly, their mouth begins to open, waiting in anticipation and a smile on your face, their response is “Can I get a coffee?”   You immediately realize that this is going to really be an enjoyable experience for all parties involved. 
So you walk away with your slightly less peppy step to grab the coffees.  Walking back to the table you deliver the coffee and begin your typical spiel about today’s catch of the day!  In the middle of explaining the sale price on crab legs, you’re immediately cut off mid-sentence with; “We’re only here for the coffee.”  One word pops into your head, unbelievable.  The next words you would like to say is, “Mannerisms are also on special today, would you like a cup or two?” But you don’t, you simply nod and walk back to your venting area, better known as the kitchen. 
Approximately twenty minutes go by and another familiar scenario walks through the door; the family of five with two toddlers, an infant and of course the mom and dad who appear to already be arguing.  Approaching this lively bunch you quickly realize that this table is going to be quite the contrary of the last table you waited on. 
“We want Mountain Dew!”  exclaims the kids.  The mother looks at you and says “they’ll both have water.”  Dad pipes up and say’s “C’mon let them have a Mountain Dew, they’ve been good today.”  Then it hits you, oh no, world war three is upon us.  After an awkward minute or two of intense arguing and kicks under the table, you are finally able to get their drink order.  
After delivering the drinks to their table, you walk away and give them a much needed minute or two to figure out their food order.  A few minutes go by and you start back towards the table and suddenly you’re a bit puzzled at what that you see on the table.  Immediately you realize that the children are building this gigantic castle, made of coffee creamers and packets of sugar.  After finishing up their food order, you ask the mother if she would like you get the children some coloring books and crayons, assuming the kids must be bored out of their minds.  “They’re fine!”  Terrific, you think to yourself, just go ahead and let them keep building Buckingham Palace there on the table.  The children and the father all state in amazement at the woman, the tension could be cut with a knife. 
“You know what you could get me though, are some crackers for my baby.”  You do as you’re told keeping in mind the nice tip that will be waiting for you after the great food and service they receive. 
Dinner is finished.  The table looks as if a bomb of ketchup, mustard and creamers exploded on it.   The kids are running around like a bunch of wild hyenas.  It appears as if a saltine cracker tornado just ravaged across the carpet.  Is that creamer on the ceiling?  In disbelief, you deliver them their bill and wait patiently for them to leave.  These troops really should retreat back to their safe haven, wherever that is.
Now you’re approaching a deserted battlefield, when in astonishment you stop dead in your tracks and peer down at the $2.50 tip lying on top.  The bill was $60.00 and they left a $2.50 tip.  You’re quickly reminded by a fellow waiter that you make less than $3.00 an hour for that?  Your blood begins to boil. 
Do people really think that a $2.00ish tip is the standard for a dinner out?  Perhaps they simply don’t have a lot of money?  I get that.  Trust me, I totally understand, but then perhaps you should stop and ask yourself if going to the restaurant for $60.00 is a good idea before you jump in the car. 
After a long and exhausting day, your shift finally comes to an end.  Walking towards the door you peer over and see the old couple from earlier in the day still sitting in their booth, over welcoming their stay and definitely exhausting the coffee supply.  You stop and ask yourself if you should wait until they leave to collect your tip, yet just then you’re quickly reminded of the events from earlier and conclude that the estimated $.10 tip wouldn’t benefit much to your college tuition.  With less than $25.00 in your pocket and your spirits worn thin, you climb into your car, drive to the nearest gas station and pick up a newspaper, because after a shift like that, want ads are sounding pretty tempting. 


Friendships; Progression & Regression


“Best friends are people you don’t need to talk to every single day.  You don’t need to talk to each other for weeks, But when you do, it’s as if you didn’t even stop talking.” –

I’m constantly running into this saying, or something like it, online and it got me thinking.  While I do believe this is true in some aspects and for some individuals, I don’t know if I necessarily believe that this is relevant for me. 

Now in my late twenties, I can say with confidence that I’ve been blessed with great friends and family.  You quickly realize out of high school and in your early twenties, which friends are worth keeping and which you should, not necessarily kick to the curb, but definitely re-evaluate and distant yourself from.  In any event, I evaluated early on and have been fortunate enough to have a great circle of friends for a long time, which is perhaps exactly why I’m moved to write this excerpt on friends, expectations and growing into adulthood. 

A couple of different things/scenarios sparked my interest lately.   Allow me to begin with expectations.  Friendships, like any relationships, have certain expectations that should be met by both parties.  I’ve been known to have particularly high expectations of my few (2-3) best buds.  If you’re so, unbelievably close to a couple of friends who know your deepest, darkest secrets, have been with you through thick and thin and vice versa, I hold you, my friend, to higher standards and expectations than other, important, yet inconsequential friends, period.  Take it for what it is, it’s my truth and when you begin to let me down countless times, I’ll always give you the benefit of the doubt, you will get second, third, and a fourth chance, however don’t mistake my kindness for weakness.  I can see right through bullshit and countless inexcusable excuses.  Your BFF status with me is something we’re both very fortunate to have and like all relationships, these require work.  Work doesn't have to be as daunting as it sounds.  I’m not necessarily requesting your physical presence 1-2 times a week, not even necessarily once every two weeks, however – communication is some way, shape or form is exceptionally important.   If I’m thinking of you enough to shoot over a text, call, or send you a card in the mail, I’d hope you’d reciprocate that same gesture from time to time. 

Transitioning from close/best friends to merely, good friends, I’m perplexed by my countless effort to keep these relationships continuing when the effort is not reciprocated.  While my expectations of these good friends aren’t as high as my close friends, I don’t understand, at times, why I continue to reach out to certain individuals, when once again, it’s not reciprocated.  If I reach out to one of these good friends and never hear a response, or invite them to multiple events with no responses such as “yes, I’d love to come,” or “sorry can’t make it,” my last ditched efforts to maintain a close friendship with you, are quickly falling to a mere friendly acquaintance.  I can’t count on two hands how many times I’ve reached out to people I was once VERY close with and they’ve distanced themselves so much, that they don’t even acknowledge my effort, extremely disappointing and quite frankly, just plain rude.    However, if you are one of my close friends who at least has the decency to simply acknowledge my effort, I thank you for your common courtesy, however, you too are on the chopping block- for this two way street turns into a one way road far too often.  If I’m the one to always make arrangements for dinner, initiate texts, phone calls, etc… you’re beginning to help me realize that you’re too busy for my good friendship in your life.  I can understand and appreciate growing older, starting families, careers and meeting new friends, however I never wanted to leave you behind and I feel as if I was more disposable than you led me to believe. 

Whether you’re a close friend, good friend or a mere friendly acquaintance, allow me to add that your false assumptions do not constitute an excuse for not reaching out.   Are we 100% relatable, no.  Do I have children, no.  Do I like to go out, yes.  Do I work, yes.  Do I have several obligations, yes.  Do I have a lot on my plate, most times, yes.  HOWEVER, when given the option to take a call, reply to a text or attend an event that I was invited to, or simply given the opportunity to meet up for coffee, I think my willingness speaks loudly.  I always acknowledge efforts made by others, and while I’m not always able to answer a call, make it to an event or text back in seconds, you best believe I’ll reach back out to you in some way shape or form, after all, this my friends is not just the actions of a best/good friend, it’s in the simplest form, common courtesy.

Call this a rant if you will, I’m calling it an epiphany of a sort.  Looking at this in depth, I am saddened a little, however more so, I’m simply trying to make sense of how relationships can progress and regress so frequently and unapologetically.  I’m beginning to understand that focusing so much of time and attention to people that don’t reciprocate that attention, is not necessarily a waste of time, but rather unnecessary.  It is what it is.  I’m going to use this time to realize that I need to focus more time and attention on my family, my passions, my fiancĂ©, new friends and those few old friends that still care enough maintain a friendship.   I’m beginning to realize that moving forward with new friends is at times the only option.  As a former Girl Scout, I can appreciate the “make new friends, keep the old,” however I’m only keeping you as close as your time, schedule, drive and want can accommodate.    The “I’m really busy” excuse, while not necessarily untrue in totality, it’s over abused and unnecessary.  If you’re as close to someone as you think you are, you make time for that person.  Allow me to reiterate, not necessarily physical time, but any sort of communication may be sufficient, dependent on circumstance.  Nonetheless, thank you for taking the time to read and I hope the solid relationships you do possess in your life continue to flourish.  I’ll leave you with a quote on friendship that is seemingly more apparent to me in my adulthood.

“A friendship can weather most things and thrive in thin soil; but it needs a little mulch of letters and phone calls and small, silly presents every so often – just to save it from drying out completely.”